A position was advertised in another team recently and, having found out that the interviews and selection process would be handled by the stakeholders from outside Scotland, I decided to apply to try and get one first promotion in almost 6years.

Fortunately or unfortunately, the Director was not aware that I had applied for the position and after the whole interview process, I was adjudged the best of the 9 applicants. The interview process was conducted directly by the stakeholders who would be funding the position. Alas, an offer was typed up and presented to the Director for her signature.

Not unexpectedly, she decided she was not going to sign it. However, she was told that I had been informed about my success at the interview stage. She then decided to tell the stakeholders that I was 'not a team player'. Stakeholders were adamant that they wanted me on the job as I was the one who they felt sure could do the job.

So, yesterday she called me into her office and informed me that she was not got to give me the promotion but that she was going to offer me a secondment to continue in my present status but doing the job as though I had been promoted. She explained that she felt that I had not been a team player for not being talkative enough at team meetings.

If I do the job for 3 months and she is happy, she will then offer me a promotion. In an organisation where I had been racially insulted several times by different individuals and management has never deemed it fit to address those issues, the Director says that I am not contributing enough to Team meetings!!! Talk so I can get more abuse from my Scottish colleagues???

I have a choice to turn down the offer but what will happen afterwards? Stakeholders will be displeased if they have to conduct another interview for the position or maybe they'll take the funding elsewhere in Europe. I guess she's rather have that than have me promoted.

Sometime after the first incident, I was having a discussion with some people who I considered 'friends' and they were wanting to know why I chose to come to live in Scotland rather than staying in England. I responded by saying that I had been offered a place to study on a funded program in a College and didn't want to go to England as I wasn't sure if such funding would be available to me in England. It was a European Union social fund.

The same lady had been listening to the discussion and she just blurted out that he has come here to take education for free when he would not have been able to get same in his country. She was going on about this so I really got annoyed and spoke back warning her to stay clear of me and everything that has to do with me. When I looked around me, I saw bland faces showing no feeling or expression.

The incident was reported to HR and HR investigated for a few days before coming back to me to ask me if I wanted to take the matter further. My assumption was that a reported incident should have been dealt with officially but how wrong that proved to be. The way in which the HR manager actually put it to me was like trying to tell me that if I dont tell them to drop this now, my life would be hell in this work place...my life here has been hellish ever since then. Anyway, I just said I would not want to take it any further than it has already gone so far. I didn't know if/where I would get another job should they get angry with me and find reasons to make me redundant.

However, ever since then, everybody within the organisation was given a dossier on me and warned not to interact with me. This became obvious because everyone went out of their way to avoid me like a plague. New employees were also warned against having anything to do with me; I knew this but it was confirmed when one new employee decided to tell me what he had been told. He actually became a very good friend of mine and told me to ignore most of what's going on. It was easy for him to say that but I understand that if you've never experienced something, you cant understand how it feels.

I'll continue...

Okay, I'll try and start writing about how I got where I am. It may be a little disjointed but I'll write as I recollect.

I joined this organisation about five and a half years ago and I was made to understand that I would be judged based on my performance and nothing else (I had apprehensions about being a black man working in Scotland). Not too many black men in Scotland work in offices. It seems to be the case that most black guys, no matter how qualified, have to do menial jobs. I even had a doctor friend who was working as a security guard before he found a job and moved downsouth.

Anyway, I have distracted.
Not long after I started working here, a lady (I was to find out later that she is very popular) insulted me by telling me in no uncertain terms that I had come to Scotland and had been given a council flat when locals cant get flat and that I should return whence I came. I found this rather insulting especially considering the fact that I had taken a run down flat in an area where no local wanted to live and I was paying due rent for it. There were also many empty flats around me that the locals did not want.

I reported this incident to our boss and he explained to me that she must have got carried away and I should just forget it. I did not forget it but I did not pursue it any further.

I tried to stay clear of her and tried avoiding contact with her whenever possible.

I'll continue this later...

Rumour has it that some people are trying very hard to ensure the guy with the gollywog on his desk returns to work here. It's utterly unimaginable.

Hopefully, he wont be returning with his taunting gollywog

One of them who's had a gollywog on his desk to taunt seems to have landed himself in hot soup and is expected to be dismissed.

I should have never voiced a complaint about my treatment at work. Now I get booted to a department where I cant even do anything and I lose my bonus pay.

it's really great working in this place.

Grrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhh I wanna go back home!!!

I cant believe this manager of mine at work. He says I'm not allowed to hum anything to myself while I'm working at my desk.

This makes me think I'm living in Mugabe's territory. I'm not one of his 'crew' and he is not hiding the fact that he'd rather not have this strange looking, strange talking and never drunk guy in his team.

I guess I'll be in trouble if I should cough at work

I got the news about my appeal hearing today. My appeal was upheld and the lady even said that my 'boss' should not have presented the matter officially.

Still a long way for me to go. It's best to return where I am from but is it right for me to return now?...

This is just like any other day. The only difference is that I have an appeal hearing today after having appealed the earlier decision.

It's an absolute joke...this place. I cant believe that these people actually believe the charade they create here is real. Smoking mirrors? yeah.

There's very little covered in smoke thus giving the impression that something really exists inside the smoke

'Necessity is the mother of invention'

I need to re-invent myself and find a way of escape from this torment so I have decided to apply for a few jobs and see where that takes me. Not that I am too optimistic because I dont want to leave my location...I have dependants to think about. My foreign sounding is often more than enough for employers in this part of the world to make up their minds about my job applications.

I was in the mood for writing earlier but this site was down...now, I cant bring myself to do it.

Later then...